You must understand that most of my understanding of Tea Party politics comes from The Guardian and the BBC. The Guardian, I agree, is a rather woolly-liberal left-of-centre rag, but the BBC? Prides itself on making sure both sides think her reportage is biased.
The basic ‘idea’ behind the Tea Party Movement – outrage at the government bailing out the banks, resentment of ‘government interference’, being pro-free-markets – are all comprehensible, even reasonable (not that I agree with free markets, what with being a raging Communist European cheese-eating surrender-monkey [Mmmmm, havarti - Ed]). But then the Tea Party fields Mid-Term Election candidates like Christine O’Donnell [moron], Glenn Beck [media whore. Shouty media whore], Rand Paul [misogynist thug.] [STOP PRESS - oh good God they've elected the misogynist thug]. Dear, dear, beloved USA, what the fucking fuck?
And the whole ‘Obama is a Muslim (despite the fact he goes to a Christian Church regularly) and wasn’t even born in the USA’ thing (poor Hawaii. It may have only been a State since 1959 but it’s been part of USA territory since 1898). It looks call-for-the-men-in-white-coats insane this side of the Atlantic.
I assume Tea Partyers [Partyites? Partinis? Partaloons?] don’t give a flying-fercrying that We The Rest of the Planet think they’re insane. I assume, in fact, that giving a flying-fercrying would be seen as an act of weakness and the giver of the flying-etc. would be hunted down by an armed Sarah Palin in a helicopter. [Is this the one who thinks New Hampshire is in the great Northwest?]. So there’s nothing any of us this side of the Atlantic can say to the USA about politics that would have any kind of useful impact. [The Guardian (bless, the patronising eejits) even tried it in 2004 and the good denizens of Ohio were, unstartlingly, deeply unimpressed.]
And yet, dearest USA, best friend and closest ally and child of our loins, grown up so very tall and strong, whatever you do, whatever you decide, fucks directly with us Europeans. We’ve helped you fight your wars, we’ve bolstered your economy and bought your pretty computers. We eat, drink, love, breathe and shit your culture. When you rile up Differently Religious nations, they bomb us as well as you. When your economy tanks, it takes ours down with it. When you shout ‘jump!’ we all shout ‘how high?’ (and then argue about whether that’s too high or not high enough, admittedly, but at least we react). You are now, whether we commie bleeding-hearts like it or not, the Alpha of the Western pack. You are responsible for a great deal more than the shenanigans going on inside your own borders. Your shenanigans, no matter how much we protest, are our shenanigans too. Thanks for that, oh Globally Dominant ones. Any chance of electing some people who could point to us on a map?